More Laws Will Save Us

Each new asinine thing that is dreamed up pushes me a little closer. Just like Grandmaster Flash, I'm tryin' not to lose my head.

Say what?

The latest foray into the absurd is courtesy of Illinois lawmakers, who have decided that it should be illegal to talk on a cell phone and walk across the street at the same time.

It's a safety factor, you see. People are getting hurt! How can we stop this? Legislate.

I've also seen bike riders get hurt. Perhaps we can eliminate bikes.

The government must have the ability to save the people. It must.

God forbid these fuckwits spend more time thinking about how to better the Chicago Public Schools and getting the state budget done on time. Possibly, they could stop engaging in the kind of activity that gets the IL Governor linked to the likes of Antoin Rezko. I know we aren't going to spend much time on a long standing history of political patronage, especially not the more recent variety.

Those sorts of things are overblown. The populace is too stupid to see how innocent it all really is. They are, in fact, so stupid that we need to protect them from themselves...and their phones.