More Movie Madness

Wow! I've really taken in a lot of junk of late. As such, I must point out that I actually have liked a movie or two in my day. Really. It's just hard to recall when that was. Perhaps I drown them out with the next barrage of pointless screen candy. On the other hand, I really enjoy a lot of movies other people don't like. Perhaps my brain's neutron flow had the polarity reversed in a traumatic childhood incident. Let's not talk about that, let's get down to business.

Cloverfield (2008)
I have nothing particularly insightful to add to what has been said, similar to the lack of anything new that comes from watching this movie. It was short. I liked that. The concept must have sounded dandy in the meetings. There is a rash of uncomfortable things that can happen between concept and execution. I'm fairly certain the folks in charge had heard about the backlash to the other movies using this kind of camera view. They obviously didn't care. By the 25th minute, I had had it with the camera. Shortly after that, I realized that I didn't care what happened in this movie. What I wanted was a new look monster, some explosions and maybe something gross. I got a homemade movie similar to watching Kramer's version of "Cry, Cry Again". These folks did a real nice job making it look exactly like some inexperienced nitwit captured the whole thing on miniDV. Excellent job. There was a moment I wondered why the young lass was still wearing heels, why the secondary beasts sounded like angry muppets, why I had to see the stupid love story semi-develop, why it was all going to end in a way you thought it was, why the end scenes were so tragically bad (particularly, the meet-and-greet with the Monster), and why I should pay attention to such things as 6:42 am when it clearly doesn't fucking matter.

Now, all that said, there was a line about flaming homeless people that made me chuckle (don't look at me like that, it was funny) and there were moments in the initial destruction sequences that it worked very well. The acting was good enough and there was some nice stuff to look at on screen. I still wanted more Monster and less camera dancing. I am prone to bad monster flicks so I have no problem recommending it. Your mileage may vary. It wasn't a slam dunk. PASS

Side note: I actually enjoyed all the sidebar stories leading up to the release. The internet connectivity and all that jazz. It did nothing for movie watching experience, though.

The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (2007)
Damn! This was long. 160 minutes. The title is a bit unwieldy too. Firstly, the scenery is spectacular. Sweeping vistas, big country (Western Canada, I gather, but I'm too lazy to find out for sure). The story was decent, I think. The acting, in parts, was really good. I enjoyed what I saw. Pitt was good. Same for Casey Affleck, Sam Rockwell and Jeremy Renner. It was, all things considered, a good Western. I'm sure someone somewhere loved it to pieces. Myself, I found my attention wandering and needing to break for spells. The movie, I believe, intended some of that feeling, but I just wasn't interested at that moment, in waiting it out. Still, comparatively, it was a solid effort and clearly, all the artists involved cared about what they were producing. PASS

Stardust (2007)
WTF? A town out in the boonies is separated from a land of magic by a small stone wall. A youngster crosses the border in search of a fallen star (later determined to be Claire Danes). There's a kingship up for grabs, witches, ghosts, spells, pirates and a cursed slave girl. Ridiculous, I say!

OK, I don't know why I watched this (familiar refrain from me). I didn't know anything about it. Until the writing of the previous sentence, I was not aware that it was an adaptation of the Neil Gaiman novel (that I haven't read). Well, it was humorous and soft. Not in that, this is what comes of 12 shots of whiskey and an ugly hooker kind of way, more like a comfortable sweatshirt and an old couch. The story bopped along, keeping my attention as it moved smoothly, and with good pace, toward the inevitable conclusion (it is a fairy tale after all). Strong writing was aided by the likes of Ian McKellen, Peter O'Toole, Rupert Everett, Michelle Pfeiffer, Sarah Alexander, Robert De Niro, and Ricky Gervais.

So, despite another blow to my macho image, this one gets a PASS.